Sunday, March 18, 2007

All The Best To Me

Forgive me, I am in one of my sullen and sorry moods.

The truth is, I am a jack of all trades. I can do many, many wonderful stuff but unfortunately, not ever good enough to make 'anything' out of them.

For example, I can play the piano but I learnt only until grade 6. I got a first class for beginner's French at university and took Japanese at boarding school for 4 years but until now, I can't speak these languages if my life depended on it. I learnt mandarin while in primary school but was never really serious about it. I write a little, cook a little, even sew a little. The list goes on but why does it have to be 'a little'?

I feel, unlike the cakes that I have baked and displayed in this blog, I myself, am only 'half baked'. I am regretful, you see, and the only thing I can do now is ensure that my children will finish everything they start - unlike me.

But recently, I was informed of a chance to finish one of the things that I have started (none of the above, though - I told you the list goes on!). And after staring at the floor for some time to think it over, I have decided to settle it once and for all.

This will require a lot of sacrifice, determination and will from me. But I really want to finish something in my life, so, I must do this.

I MUST, at least, try to finish this.

12 comments:

Dad of Four said...

Aren't we all like that? Anyway ,all the best to you....

mother of two said...

i consider myself if not 100 % is like you too...half-baked. After taking VSS, I tried to do all sorts of works...but they seem not interest me. Sometimes and many times, I feel like a loser...at 37 with 2 kids and yet to achieve anything successfully that i am proud of in my life. AT least you have found something that you are able to finish it off...meanwhile I am still searching....and searching....

Ayu said...

Stop moping around lah.. None of us are perfect. Mesti ada sebab we couldn't finish something. And if we didn't/couldn't finish something no one has the right to can call us a failure anyway. Yang penting we give it our best shot. Man purposes, God disposes, kan?

Come to think of it.. takkan kalau belajar masak tapi tak jadi chef you are considered as a failure? Atau belajar menjahit kena jadi fashion designer?

cp1 said...

this column hit me, a big one .. i too realised that i tend to do half way job which my mom always reminds me that "bila buat apa2 mesti habiskan" .. my symptom would be the big P, procastination .. bad really bad ..

halwafy said...

Dad of 4: Are we?? But some of us are more at ease about it than others, I suppose..

Mother of two: You are NOT a loser, you just haven't found that thing you really love and really want to do. What's important is that u keep on searching..

Ayu: No la..I'm not moping at all..just at times there's a deep seated dissatisfaction within myself sbb i can't seem to be really really good at something..or finish something..

FloweRinTheDesert said...

Gosh you're starting to sound like ME!!! lol

Dad of 4 and Ayu are probably right. We are all like that in some way or another, altho I do admit my secret desire to be a chef and/or some kind of designer. ;)

But eventho I'm a 'half baked' Cheese Choc myself (mmm yums), I'm definitely, definitely NOT a LOSER. So if I'm not, believe me you all out there aren't one either. ;)

G'luck to you my dear on your unfinished business. he he

which bunny? said...

hmmm.. i think i ve heard this one before on our many rides from mv to ktm station.. tul tak?

and i think i know which 'thing' you mean.. insyAllah i will make prayers for you..

in the mean time cheer it on up luv.. i find it mighty good to know a little bit of everything! ;)

halwafy said...

cp1: Yes..the big P. Me, not so much that problem..just lack of determination, always took things easy and not serious about things..these are my follies, unfortunately.

flowerin: Half baked Cheese Choc? What half baked cake am I, I wonder.. :) And no, you're definitely not a loser, girl..with those wonderful and talented kids of yours??

bunny: Thanks :)

The Blueberry said...

Hey, are you describing me?! LOL. As it is with everyone else I too am half-baked. Can't find anything I'm too passionate about to fully immerse myself. Maybe not yet. I'm keeping my optimism in tach. You should too, what with your "finishing project" starting soon. Whatever it is, I wish you all the best!

Halwafy, if you noticed I have linked your blog to mine. I hope you don't mind?...

The Blueberry said...

Sorry, that should read "optimism in tact". Biasa la malam-malam cam nie mesti tershashul!

halwafy said...

the blueberry,

He he..tershashul pulak ye..:) don't bother to correct next time - because I know you've got perfect English from your blog - I would think, 'mesti typo ni'..he he

Why do we all have this dissatisfaction within ourselves? If we don't do something abt it, we will definitely have regrets in the future, huh..

All the best in looking for that certain 'thing' in your life and thanks for the wish, for dropping by and linking. I have also taken the opportunity to link yours to mine!

Lenwë Aldaríon said...

All the best Kak Ibah!

Whatever the mind can perceive, it can achieve :)